i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
