I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Randomize
