Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
