he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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