You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
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drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
You have to summon your inner elephant
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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