OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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