I feel like abortions should bother me more
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize