So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
