adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"