somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?