Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
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