He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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