I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize