So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
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the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Dicks are not precious.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
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