I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize
