To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize