So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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