nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
they call him Oral-B. enough said
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
