I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
i've created a new STD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize