I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
