I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
its not stalking. its research.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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