Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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