Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
