This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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