oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
