That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
