their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
