I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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