ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
