dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
