You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
