ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
