All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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