that's an acceptable place to lick
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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