3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Randomize