i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
