I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
