Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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