Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
