Sponge bath it is.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
