she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
my being single is dangerous.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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