you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
home. puking in laundry basket.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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