U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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