just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
