worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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