I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
