You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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