I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize