What a fucking waste of an outfit
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
don't judge my taste in strippers
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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