If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize