Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize