Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Randomize
